Tag Archives: Book reviews

Titanic May Spectacular! Freebies! Swag! Collectibles! Check it out!

Slide1 Hi Folks, So here’s the deal… I need to sell about 100 copies of Pax Titanus. It’s a serious issue. It means the difference between earning a book contract or well, NOT. So, I have put together a special THANK YOU/ MEGA ULTIMATE FAN PACK for ANYONE who PURCHASES or REVIEWS my latest book, Pax Titanus during the month of May. What’s in the PACK?

AND… If you PURCHASE AND REVIEW, I will throw in a glossy 8 1/2″ x 11″ Glossy print of the Pax Titanus cover art, ready for framing. Pretty cool, right? The conditions are simple:

  • Buy a print or ebook copy of Pax Titanus on Amazon in the month of May 2015.
  • Review Pax Titanus on Amazon, Goodreads, or Barnes and Noble. (Amazon is preferred).
  • Send an email confirmation of either to Room1331 at gmail dot com.
  • I will ask you for a mailing address and what you’d like your autograph plate to read.
  • I will send you the awesomeness. Anywhere in the world. I ain’t kidding.

BUT KIND SIR, I’ve already done both things. I think you are a kick-ass dude. Surely, there’s some love for me? I hear you. I love you. Really. But I’m in a tough spot right now. This might be time to buy a copy for a friend. Time to conspire. You can split the booty. Please share, retweet, send smoke signals, etc. This is a big, desperate times push kind of thing. Let’s throw down.

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Book Review: The ADHD Vampire

The ADHD Vampire by Matthew Vaughn

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From the back cover:

A cruise ship for retired sex addicts, The U.S.S. Exciter, is the site of a party a lot of people on board will never forget (but some of them will, anyway). Lurking in the cargo hold is Horace Dracul, half-brother of the legendary Dracula, and he dreams of reaching the shores of a country where the blood flows like wine, and bright, shiny lights are seemingly infinite. However, another member of the Exciter’s well-aged population has some secrets of her own: Martha—retired cyborg and ex-spy.

In the grand tradition of slasher-horror literature in which a lot of people are murdered in gruesome ways, The U.S.S. Exciter will host an orgy of violence and sex toys, and an easily-distracted vampire named Horace might have himself a bloody-good time.

Now then:

If you are a bit tired of the typical vampire fare – sexy vamps, teenage angst vamps, zombie vamps, Will Smith, etc. – but love the genre, I humbly present this quick and funny read from Matthew Vaughn.

Although filled with the ludicrous story elements that make a bizarro book great: things like geriatric swingers, cyborg grannies, and the books’ titular monster (a vampire with honest-to-goodness ADHD), what impressed me the most about the book was that it was clear that the author had done his research.

If you know your Dracula, if you have read the source material that is so often ignored by those who pen blood-sucker stories, you will be most pleased by the fact that although the book is a lightning fast kill-fest where you meet a character just in time to watch them become lunch, it honors the core material and mythology. I found this to be a pleasant surprise. I wish more authors would take the time to go to the origins of a genre before spitting out some inbred trope nightmare.

As mentioned above, it’s a fast read. Vaughn doesn’t dwell in any scene for long, but for a story such as this, it’s obviously appropriate (yes, that’s an ADHD joke). The narrative moves and never takes a breath. Jokes come in and you’re barely done laughing until the next one hits you. There’s plenty of blood and gore and sexy as you buzzsaw through the story.

I had a great time with this book and I look forward to seeing what Mr. Vaughn does next.

FREE PAX TITANUS STUFF!!!

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FREE STUFF!!!

Post an honest review for Pax Titanus on Amazon or Goodreads this weekend and I’ll send you some Pax Titanus bookmarks, Leather to the Corinthians stickers, postcards and some mystery items!!!

Just a couple sentences will do. You don’t need to post a book report.

Comment with the link to your review and I’ll handle the rest. Here’s Pax on Amazon for your convenience.

http://amzn.com/1621051641

Oh…tell your friends!!! Free stuff for all!!!

Book Review: Crafting the Character Arc by Jennie Jarvis

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A quick Google search for writing advice will result in approximately 7 billion hits. That’s a craft article for every person on the planet. There is more writing about writing on the Internet than there is actual writing. Some of this advice is good, some bad, and some – I’m pretty sure was put there by highly competitive writers that are hoping you will follow it so that your writing will SUCK FOREVER.

Something one hears often is that characters should be engaging, relatable, and must change over the course of the story. It’s obvious advice. But unless you are already a pro, how to pull this off might not be so obvious. And if you’re a pro, you probably don’t need the advice in the first place – but thanks for reading my book review anyway. You’re a peach!

If you are looking to create a path for your character that will be compelling — a character that your readers will connect with and root for – this book is a great place to start. Jarvis presents the blueprint for a character arc that will put them through the paces, challenge them, and ultimately force them to grow.

The lessons and information provided are clear and practical. The examples used are from popular stories and although you might not know all of them, you are certain to know some. There’s also a dash of wit about it that makes it a fun read, even if you are a peach of a pro.

Crafting the Character Arc: A Practical Guide to Character Creation and Development by Jennie Jarvis is a worthy book for any writer’s reference shelf.

Are You a Book Reviewer?

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I’m still under NDA, but just between you and me and the Internet, I have a new book coming out in a few weeks.

I AM DYING TO TELL YOU ALL ABOUT IT….HAVE TO WAIT JUST A BIT LONGER…

My publisher has given me a PDF version for distributing to reviewers. I’m curious if anyone out there in WordPress-land (and the greater WordPress-land area) might be interested? I’m looking for folks with book review blogs and the like.

Quick facts:

It’s a novella. You can read it in an afternoon.

It’s the tender story of a four-armed, war hammer wielding, intergalactic gladiator. Think comedic space opera laced with potty humor.

Interested?

Reply below to secure your review copy today. You can also click on “Contact” on the navigation menu up top.
Photo Credit: paulbence via Compfight cc

Book Review: That Semicolon Bitch Had To Die

That Semicolon Bitch Had To DieThat Semicolon Bitch Had To Die by Tom Conrad

My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Can a man obsessed with punctuation find love? Can a man who finds that love keep it? Can that man avoid possible litigation and potential prison time?

Tom Conrad doesn’t quite answer these questions, but even if he did, I wouldn’t tell you. You have to read the book.

Like many books, I picked this up on a whim. I’ve enjoyed Conrad’s public musings and quips via Twitter and his blog and there comes a time when a man needs to be a man and download a book and dig in. And if he’s a TRUE MAN, he reviews it on his blog that also features sensitive poetry.

This novella is a darkly humorous introduction to Conrad’s Frankie Drake, a struggling and somewhat easily intimidated aspiring writer (and the star of Conrad’s full length novel That Coxom and Blondage Affair). When he meets Abbey, a fellow writer, as well as a kindred-and-potentially-more-talented spirit (soul mate?), he’s all in. Based on the title of the book, one can surmise what direction the relationship ultimately takes.

The story is refreshingly in the moment, with several key moments happening via Twitter transcripts. In time, it will seem quaint, but for now — it’s very now. Conrad has a good grip on word play and the general techno-babble silliness that is modern English, as it has seen some storm damage courtesy of the ever-influence of technology and an alarming simplification (abstraction?) of interpersonal communication. He nicely balances a statement on the post-existential world of online love with a deft, timeless depiction of the great no-no: two artists of the same medium should never start a relationship. (Also, never date an actress. Seriously, it’s a bad idea.)

As an American reader, I didn’t have any difficulty with the more English aspects of the story (mainly descriptions of rain, lots of rain) but then again, everything I learned about the finer nuances of living in the UK came from The Young Ones, so I am properly educated in these matters. Once you have mastered the insult, “Codpiece Face,” the rest is nothing but tea and strumpets.

Love, the sweet and the sour, is something Frankie has difficulty handling. It’s fun for the reader to watch him try.

View all my reviews

Book Review: The Three Sisters

The Three SistersThe Three Sisters by Bryan Taylor

My rating: 5 of 5 stars

Hell’s bells. They are ringing….

Some may sell their soul for success, but Bryan Taylor gleefully throws the soul baby out with the bath water in this outrageously sacrilegious satire that stacks intricate word play, sexy nuns, social commentary, sexy nuns, high-concept satire, sexy nuns, clever characters, and just for good measure, sprinkles sexy nuns on top.

Although I don’t have the religious legacy of the author, I spent my Catholic high school years in the back of the church listening to Black Flag on my Walkman while concocting the most inappropriate and blasphemous thoughts I could muster.

So yeah, the book spoke to me.

A well-written story that challenges religion, the media, morals, and more. I look forward to seeing more from this intelligent and witty author.

That being said, I wonder if Hell has a turndown service? I think there may be a mint with Taylor’s name on it.

View all my reviews

Learn more about Bryan Taylor here.